I’m Sorry I Went Missing

You guys….whoa. I’m sorry I just high-tailed it out of sight for a while. Ok, a super duper long time. Like almost a year. Yikes. I suck.

I’m alive, I have two adorable twin boys that are 6 MONTHS! Can you believe it? And we are already planning on when we will have Baby number 3!

I mean…LOOK at them! So different, and so loved! Best investment I ever made.


So listen, I’ve started a new blog. I know…I could’ve just used this one but this was my secret, private one and this other one isn’t so much.

Please head over to my new blog and follow me along there. I miss you all and think about you all constantly!

Go here:





Stim Meds Left Over

I have so many medications left over and I would HATE to see these go to waste. If anyone is interested in the following please let me know in the comments and I will get in contact with you to discuss further.

I just know we won’t be needing the meds for a few more years for the next round of IVF but Stims we won’t need regardless since we have babies in the freezer at the moment.

Leuprolide Acetate Injection (1mg/0.2ml) –  I have a full package with syringes and alcohol wipes, never used. Also, have a little left in a second bottle that I can send as well. Expires 04/2016


Follistim AQ Cartridge 300IU with 7 needles. Unused/unopened Follistim Pen and extra needles. – Expires 01/2016.


Progesterone in Oil Injection (500mg/10ml) – 2 full bottles and 1 bottle a little less than half. Also, I have a bag full of unused/unopened syringes and the 18 gauge and 22 gauge needles for this. Expires 10/2017


Nuvaring Birth Control – Unopened/unused. I used this since I’m sensitive to normal pill birth control and this is the only thing that doesn’t make me sick. Expires 07/2017


Menopur (75IU) – Includes the sodium chloride to dissolve into the menopur bottles. Expires 08/2016


Ganirelix Acetate (250 mcg(0.5ml) – 1 unopened injection. Expires 06/2017


If there is anything that anyone is interested in, please let me know in the comments! It’s not a lot of stuff but any little bit helps right?

20 Weeks – More Than Halfway There!

I went in for my 20 week ultrasound this morning. This was the first time that the husband got to join since that horrific ultrasound we had at 7 weeks where we thought we had a miscarriage but ended up being a massive blood clot. So, this was pretty fun for him. He may have even gotten a little teary eyed 🙂

This is also the ultrasound where they check the whole anatomy. I was good throughout the check with Baby A and then somewhere between the check on Baby B I started to feel reallllllllly not good. Sweaty, feeling like I’m going to pass out, chills, etc. The husband looked at me and said, “Are you ok?” and I just quietly said…”not at all.” Apparently my blood circulation was being restricted from laying on my back so long. The nurse lifted me to my left side and got me some juice. Took me a bit to get the color back in my face but all was well! Never a dull moment!

I also met with my doctor and got a flu shot which I am so excited about having. After getting sick on our travels out of the country I do NOT want to deal with that again. The doctor did have some concern because as it seems with Baby A, his umbilical cord is connecting into the side of the placenta rather than straight in the middle of it…”to the meat,” she said. This could cause some bleeding problems when it comes time for labor so we will be assigned to a high risk doctor and a c-section will be scheduled. However, she wants to revisit this with an ultrasound again in a month just to make sure since they are so small right now and they can’t be 100% sure since babies were moving like crazy in there.

Baby B also needs a revisit as they couldn’t get a good picture of his heart to see that he has four chambers. Again, just enough information to make me crazy over the next month.

20 weeks

Tomorrow night we go for the hospital tour even though I almost feel its not necessary since I was there 3 times already but would be good for the husband to see.

It’s all coming up so quickly as people start planning for baby showers and diaper parties for us. I can’t wait to meet our little guys but I just feel like I’m not ready! Of course how can I not be ready after waiting over 8 years for them?! I would do it all over again in a heartbeat. This whole journey has been one crazy ride and I just relish in each moment, thanking my ever lucky stars that I was blessed.

And also, thank all of you for being apart of this journey. You’ve been pretty inspirational!!!

18 weeks Update

Well…it’s certainly been a minute since I last blogged. Sorry bout that! It’s been a bit crazy here the past few months.

The nausea has finally subsided but only after a few hospitalizations for IV fluids since my body did not have enough calories and started eating at my fat (Tell me again Dr. how that is a bad thing?!?!)

I just got back from a trip to Europe to visit my husband’s family for the last time before the boys arrive. Flying there as I was 16 weeks pregnant and flying home at 18 weeks. NOT RECOMMENDED. I was so damn uncomfortable for that 9 hour flight. By the time I got off the plane I was nauseous and it felt like my stomach was in a vice grip. It was horrible. Took about a day until the feeling subsided. Lesson learned, I will never travel pregnant again. Never, ever! But we got to announce to everyone what we were having. I had my in-laws open up two separate packages with these socks in them.


I’ve gotten to see the boys a lot this pregnancy. With all the issues surrounding the blood clot in the uterus I’ve been in and out of doctors appointments and hospital visits where each time they did an ultrasound. My most recent one at 18 weeks was great and the two boys definitely have their own personalities already. I’ve been feeling small flutters the last two weeks but no big kicks yet. I’m also the size of an 8 month pregnant mom with a singleton.

18 weeks

I, however, do not mind any of this. I wanted this so badly. This whole IVF journey still feels like a blur sometimes. I still have a sore back from the 3 months of Progesterone shots. I’m dreading having to do that again in a few years when we try our next FET. Maybe by then there will be another option!

Speaking of, I have tons of medicines leftover. I know its obviously illegal (I like to take my chances) to trade/sell medicines but these will all go to waste and I’d rather give them to someone who needs them for a much lower price then to just throw it all in the trash. Anyone know of anything or way to do this?

Hope you all are truckin along and thinking only positive thoughts!

I’m Still Here And Hanging On

I know I haven’t written in a while. I’ve been trying to keep myself together. With the nausea finally subsiding slightly (not completely) and after several trips to the hospital I can finally put my fingers to the keyboard.

So it appears I have that extreme form of nausea that Princess Kate had. Awesome. After three days of a migraine where I couldn’t eat or drink anything I finally went in to the hospital and got an IV which seriously put life back into my body. The doctors had confirmed at that point that my body was starving and dipping in to my calorie reserve…aka…eating my own fat. I didn’t realize it was that severe but again..with twins…I gotta eat more, which is so not easy. The great news about always going to the hospital is the weekly or every other day ultrasound. Get to see those sweet alien faces 🙂

15 weeks

After that lovely visit I started gulping down Ensure shakes that most old people drink but are packed with calories and protein. I eat donuts, eggs, anything I can get my hands on to push calories in. I’m finally putting a little bit of weight on and trying to regulate myself a bit better. The only one who can help me, is me…right?!

On another note…that DAMN blood clot is still bothering me. After weeks of no spotting I started bleeding again. Terrifying enough. This pregnancy has not been easy. And why should it be? Over 7 years of TTC, $40k down the hatch, and a plethora of injections for this needle-phobia girl…why should anything be easy at this point? And people wonder why I’m not religious….

My belly has been growing quite a bit. Granted, I have two babies but man oh man! I look like I’m 5 months! (I’m only 4 now…or 16 weeks in the pregnancy world.)

16 weeks

In other news, my neighbor who has 2yr old twin girls gave us a bunch of her old stuff. Car seats, 4 car seat bases, swings, jumpers, stroller things…I mean she just saved us so much money by doing that. Incredible! I’ve been slowly going through everything and getting the baby room in order and read for furniture. It’s just all so expensive and when you have to buy two of everything…yikes!

unnamed (10)

Anyways, life is going on and I’m traveling out of the country this weekend until the second week in October to visit my husband’s family. I hope I can survive a 9 hour plane ride! Here’s hoping!!

The War On Food

People…I can not handle this much more. I am at my wits end.

12 weeks and 4 days pregnant with twins. STILL can not eat without wanting to vomit. STILL all-day nausea and constant swallowing to keep from vomiting. I really…REALLY want this stage to be done and over with.

I get really angry because for sooooo many years I had dreamed of being pregnant. After a long journey I finally am with two precious little babes but I am hating my experience so far. Am I ridiculous for saying that? I honestly thought it would be great, I would feel like a million bucks, I’d be on this amazing eating schedule filled with veggies (omg..barf) and fruit (eh…no please), and loads of protein (meat?! HELL NO!) I am so frustrated and just really want to fast-forward to mid February and with the boys arrive.

Anyone else feel siappetite-loss-ex-cont-alt-articlemilar? I feel like a jerk sometimes for just not loving the process but I can’t seem to get past how horrible I feel ALL DAY, EVER DAY for MONTHS! I’m just going a little crazy here.

Hubs and I are taking two trips this month. One next weekend to the coast near Boston. Our favorite place on earth. And then we fly overseas to visit my husband’s family at the end of September for a couple weeks. I’m just REALLY hoping I can finally eat something.

I also noticed since I’ve been on the Progesterone injections my belly is not as big as it was and it didn’t make me feel better as I thought it would. But MAN am I glad to be done with that!

Sorry I’m so whiny…I just really need a break. Or at least to know I’m not alone in this!

It’s Facebook Official

Today we officially announced our pregnancy on Facebook and every other social media site. It was pretty surreal. As the comments and well wishes continue to stream in I am just overwhelmed with happiness. People are sending me messages about how they have known since High School how badly I wanted a family of my own and it just hit me. What a struggle it was…what a journey it has been.

I’m 12 weeks and 2 days and feeling a little better each day. However I refuse to get off of the Diclegis. I live for that stuff. It’s the only thing that can help me. I also found out that eating red-skinned apples cause insane migraines. So I’ll be staying away from that for a while.

I’m off all fertility medications now. No more massive shots or horrible meds I have to shove up all my crevices. Finally, a normal…boring…and happy pregnancy.

Thought I’d give you a little glimpse of our announcement today. Don’t mind how horrible I look. I was nursing a migraine and trying not to puke. lol


baby 2